Tag Archives: Infertility

To My Baby

Happy

Happy (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Before you read any further, I would like to warn you that there are going to be acronyms, and a “tiny” bit of personal information. Read further at your own risk.

 

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When I wrote about the personal and professional life, I deliberately left one thing out: That my husband and I are also trying for a baby. At that time, I wasn’t sure who were telling, as it turns out, we don’t care who knows. In fact, we’d like everyone to know so that if anyone is having similar problems, they can understand that they are not alone.

We cannot have a baby the “normal” way. At this point, I’m beginning to think that we need to redefine normal because infertility affects 12% of the population. That’s pretty high. Anyways, so we were looking into ART which includes IVF and IUI. We had a preliminary consultation with the fertility doctor.

Our doctor told us that we look like great candidates for IVF, although not so much for IUI, or hormone therapy. The cost was slightly more than what were originally thinking. And to pay for it would wipe out our savings. essentially leaving us without the money to pay for other necessities, like bills (food, electricity) let alone anything for a baby.

And on that note, we can approach things three ways. 1. There are financing options, but my credit isn’t all that good. 2. There are a few grants out there, and we have every intention of applying a few that we can (many are location specific, and sadly, none are in our location). 3. Home-grown fundraising.

We are definitely looking into the second option. And as part of the search to find grants that we can apply to, we found one that required a letter to our future baby.  And, because we’re so nice, we’ve decided to share.

Dear Baby,

Your mommy and daddy have gone through much before they could meet you. When she was only 23, your mommy was diagnosed with melanoma, a cancer that could potentially kill her. Your daddy was in several car accidents, breaking his back several times over the years.

The result was that mommy and daddy couldn’t get you like most parents do. They needed help if they ever wanted to see you. Many babies come without planning. But mommy and daddy planned and saved just so they could have you.  And that makes you a precious miracle.

Your mommy and daddy knew that they wanted a family. When some methods they tried failed, they set up a plan. Mommy and daddy both wanted to lose weight. Mommy lost 40 pounds in the year up to trying for you again. They did research to see the best place for help in their area. The looked at ways to get this help in an affordable fashion as well. They were prepared.

When their first appointment came, their doctor said they were perfect candidates for a specific kind of help. And that made them very happy.

Baby, we do not yet know if you are a girl or boy, but we do know that we will love you with all our hearts. We are prepared to care for all your needs, for the ups and the downs. We will support you when you need it.

We hope that we can show you to be a good person, with strong morals but also independent. Do not follow the crowd simply because that’s what everyone else is doing; do it because it’s what you want to do, and it’s the right thing to do. Remember that someone can only get you down if you let them. And that you can do anything you set mind your to. Dream big and play fair. Try to stay healthy. Exercise can be fun, and it’s good for you too. Learn to laugh at yourself and your mistakes. You will make mistakes, and that’s okay.

And remember “Live Well, Laugh Often, Love Much.”

With all our love,

Mommy and Daddy

 

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